Poetry, or something like it...
...all written by Eric Altman.
Aware They
Enemy Science Fantasy
Clockwork Beast ReBegin
Liar Come On
Can I? Entitled
In Hell So Long And Thanks For All The Fear
We Were Wrong A Better Church
Excuses Take The Shot
Alone Again Wonder (For Noah)
Return To Me After You Left
Think? Whispered Lies
Poser
Aware
Calling out to the vision.
Bringing myself in.
The dream, the never-ending.
A virus called belief.
I see the right. I feel it too.
I found hell, and fell right through.
I am lost, yet again I try.
Broken dreams, bringing the disease.
You forgot! You lied! You hated everything you found inside!
You bitch! You fool! What did you think your curse would bring to you?
You never think you fall right through!
I tried to dream. I tried to be. But you infected me.
You never told me the cure was right in sight.
Leaving you. Something I can't do.
The fever swells... break out in sweats.
We had fate on our side.
We had love... now love has died.
Infecting my senses, bring my pain to bear.
Sent me visions, foolish relief.
Ecstasy drowns, makes you unaware.
And you fall, because she seemed to care.
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They
Who knew? Who ever knows?
Depression feeds, anger consumes, fire burns inside.
An instrument of destruction, a force and flame.
A violent corruption, and child who knew only shame.
They called him everything under the sun.
They knew not what they had done.
They broke his spirits and forged a demon.
They didn't know it had come.
Its easier to ask forgiveness.
Simpler then permission.
Forgot about the shame,
In that moment of pure precision.
They pushed him to the edge.
They ripped into his heart.
They named him violence.
They began, now it can't stop.
Fists flying and nostrils flared.
Fed and consumed and burned inside.
A wolf in sheep's clothing,
Rage no longer denied.
A lone soldier where a child once stood.
Turned against the foe.
Instinct protects and destroys.
Who knew? Who ever knows?
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Enemy
Everything I do, I will not do for you.
You really thought that I'd be there forever.
And everything we were, we aren't any more.
For the last time. I've forgotten you, leave me alone.
I cannot believe you would cling to me.
I cannot explain how you arranged to be my most annoying enemy.
For the first time we were fornicating.
I didn't even know your name.
For the the last time we were celebrating.
I didn't love you then, what makes you think I love you now.
I cannot believe, you would cling on to me.
I cannot explain how you arranged to be my most aggrivating enemy.
Disregarding your letters was so easy.
Why can't you find it as simple, forget me!
And regarding the way you me followed to my room...
I'll forget that one just as soon.
I cannot believe you would cling on to me.
I cannot explain how you manage to be my most disappointing enemy.
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Science Fantasy
I sound a call, a cry, a final wailing battle hiss.
I walk forever in the morning, waiting for nightfall.
You, silent as a thief in the night, invisible as a stalker.
You walk forever in the night, waiting for mourning.
You see the sun, the moon, the stars and the planets, and the vapor trails that come off the comets.
You see the struggles of gravity to break free and just be.
I am the blood, the flesh, the water and wind, hell and euphoria, heaven and wine.
I struggle against the chains yet know to be free is impossible. Freedom is destruction.
I sleep. I scream.
You run. You dream.
There is no difference between you and me. No sex, no race, no color, no face.
Yet, to walk beside you, I feel I would rip though it all.
Male and female, human and animal, black and yellow, smiles and frowns...
We are sad clowns with the power of the cosmos.
I can run beside the deer. Hunt with the lions in the serengetti night.
I can leap high with the kangeroo. But why, God damn it, why!? Can't I run beside you?
Sun and Moon. Two alien shores with a cross faded view.
Each other independant and locked in suits.
You press the buttons, I pull the string. People die either way.
I swim over the world on wings of gold. You fly over the universe on wings of silver.
I know who you are, in my screams... in your dreams.
We'd be so happy together. So many bridges we'd cross.
But life is eternally short, and I'd rather not get to that end just this quickly.
So... I'll swim, you'll fly. You'll live, I'll die.
In the end we'll meet... but I would have rather we'd met in the beginning.
For to walk beside you...
We'd make great stories.
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Clockwork Beast
Tick extends the claw
Tock opens the jaw
Tick a trickle now
Tock it soon will flow
Call a vision scream
Live a primal dream
Winged death for feast
Hungry Clockwork Beast
Tick is something lost
Tock forget the cost
Tick breathe in the scent
Tock brimstone descent
No matter what the pain
Bitter metal brain
Clarion call for feast
Dying Clockwork Beast
Ticking slowed and ceased
Pieces never greased
Death has lost it's priest
Fallen Clockwork Beast
Rusted steel's elation
Joint sings desecration
Nothing's meant to last
Clockwork Beast has past
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Rebegin
My soul is somewhere else,
My life is a sin.
I don't know why I came here...
I only know I am in.
Fortune. Broken.
Plagues my dreams of the past,
Golden. Tarnished.
Lived a life that can't last,
No more dreams of the past.
Fell away my lies today,
See right into my heart.
Spliced and flayed my callous rage,
Another chance to restart (Lost).
Some wise and rightous guise,
Excludes my pain (Bring it back).
Riotous fire and lack of desire,
Brings me back again (Failure).
Fortune. Broken.
Plagues my dreams of the past.
Golden. Tarnished.
Lived a life that can't last,
No more dreams of the past.
My soul is somewhere else,
My life is a sin.
I don't know why I'm back here...
I only know, I can't go back in.
I only know, I can't re-begin.
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Liar
What have we learned
Liars can't believe
Cold, faithless, and obscene
Desires justify the mean
Higher than our kind
We're liars anyway
All that I could find
Stolen back today
If you can, break down the day
Take the time, see there's a way
When you dare, pull on the wires
All that we have been, liars.
So bring the justice back
The forgotten can't attack
Like a plague unleash the fears
Spead the lies throughout the years
What can we ever know
Hot, bloody, and redeemed
If I fall too far below
Dreams justify means
Lower than your kind
And given back a friend
Nothing you can find
We're liars again
Bring me back home!
Let me live pretend!
Bring me back then!
Let me live pretend!
Lie to me again!
Lie to me again!
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Come On
Feed on the energy of your brother
This need we feel is to feed a hunger
Woman let me come on through
The sound alive inside of you
Come on out and come around
Tonight we're calling Bacchus down
Resist inhibition and life less exotic
Come and make this night erotic
Oooo, Oh! Come on!
Come outside and dance on fire
Consume the heat that we require
Came the night that gets you higher
Time for you to embrace desire
Oooo, oh! Come on! Come on!
Come on out and come around
Tonight we call Dionysus down
Blast out a life that's less exotic
Come and make this night erotic
Oooo, Oh! Come on!
Ooooooooo ooooooh! Come on! Come on! COME ON!
Ooooooooo OOOOOOH! COME ON!
Come on out and come around!
Tonight we call all you fuckers down!
Destroy a life that's less exotic!
Come and make this night erotic!
Come on!
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Can I?
Staring at the white walls, some other person painted.
Ceiling is all fucked up, faded blues and grey.
Window threatening the light again this morning.
Pull the blankets up, thickly over head.
Can I awaken, refreshed and full of life?
Is this a lie I tell myself?
Was there ever, a time I could recall,
That I was feeling in good health?
Sink is full of bowls and cups I can't remember.
Was it ramen, or maybe a diet coke?
So damn long ago, last I had a decent meal.
I think it could have been a real bad joke.
Can I sleep again, without fear of the sun?
Is this a dream I haven't known?
Was there ever, I bed I could recall,
That I was truly safe at home?
Many strange couches, beds, and floors.
Restless nights I talk myself outloud.
Scream out, "Dear god, what have I been doing?"
With this life, I fooled myself.
Can I fall asleep, then wake again?
Is this a wish I can't fulfill?
Was there ever, a steady breath hot on my neck,
That belonged, to someone I can feel?
Or can I at least have a glimpse of what I'm after?
I'll bleed myself, dry just for that.
Was anything ever really holding me back?
Or have I been doing that myself?
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Entitled
Did we try hard enough?
Should I be ashamed?
Was it too easy a start?
Am I too proud to say?
We were the ones that always felt entitled.
All saw potential and never got lost.
Weren't we just asking for guidance?
Not the way, but how to find it.
The homes we left, the families behind.
Afraid perhaps but damned determined to try.
Coming here to a place so strange.
The sunrise gives us another day to play.
So maybe the sure pride and fright we feel,
Is worth the risk of stepping out the door.
But when no one is there when we come home,
Is there any way for us to tell?
Did we deserve it all?
Should I be repaid?
Was it too much too fast?
Am I too dumb to say?
We were the fortunate that always had denial.
All saw our hearts and never got conceited.
Didn't we just ask for a name?
Not the fame, but how to take it?
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In Hell
Something tells me I'm wrong.
About this.
I thought better of myself.
Without this.
I guess that I was wrong.
Was never all that strong.
Without you.
You're angry I can tell.
Well, sorry I can't apologize.
Your bitterness does well,
Tell a story I don't recognize.
Somewhere deep in hell,
Is where you'll find me, Screaming!
Will you come for me?
Just because I am here now.
Don't forgive me.
When I leave you this time.
Please forget me.
I know that I am wrong.
Never was that strong.
Without you.
You're angry I can tell.
Well, sorry I can't apologize.
Your bitterness does well,
Tell a story I don't recognize.
Somewhere deep in hell,
Is where you'll find me, Screaming!
Will you come for me?
Will you come for me?
Am I worthy?
Will you fight for me?
Am I deserving?
Will you die for me?
I am waiting! Screaming!
Will you come for me?
Or will I just keep screaming?
Or will I just keep screaming?
When can I stop screaming?
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So Long And Thanks For All The Fear.
Don't answer the questions that I ask you.
You don't owe me anything at all tonight.
I was a little bit weaker before now.
But you saw just how strong I could be.
If it isn't too much to ask,
Could you just disappear.
Let the pain subside.
Take you away, my dear.
Or just believe in me,
For maybe a minute here.
Promise I will behave,
So long, and thanks for all the fear.
If you have to speak, then just say hello.
That is about all I can take tonight.
Maybe you saw something I could not.
Right about now I can't see right.
If it isn't too much to ask,
Could you just disappear.
Let the pain subside.
Take you away, my dear.
Or just believe in me,
For maybe a minute here.
Promise I will behave,
So long, and thanks for all the fear.
Sure, it's alright. I don't mind.
You don't owe me a thing at all.
I couldn't stand it before.
But now I'm ready for a fall.
Speak with me for a little while.
Tell me all about your day.
Your eyes are much better than mine.
Tell me just what you see.
If it isn't too much to ask,
Could you just disappear.
Let the pain subside.
Take you away, my dear.
Or just believe in me,
For maybe a minute here.
Promise I will behave,
So long, and thanks for all the fear.
So long, and thanks for all the fear.
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We Were Wrong
Where do you think I am going?
Thought you would understand this.
Just wanted nothing to come and ruin the moment.
But I guess... I guess... I guess...
I have no say. I have no rights. I can't belong.
I am wrong. I am wrong. I am wrong.
What do you want from me?
Did you really have a goal in mind?
I can not feel anything.
But I guess... I guess... I guess.... I guess...
I have no say. I have no rights. I can't belong.
I can't belong. I can't belong. I can't belong.
Why have you come here?
Was there a purpose or just a fly to swat?
I was a little bit angry, maybe I was wrong?
But I guess... I guess... I guess... I guess... I guess... I guess...
I have no say. I have no rights. I can't belong.
I can't belong. I can't belong. I can't belong.
Who did you think I was?
Like a curious little child you watched.
This is not for your eyes, little one.
But I guess... I guess... I guess... I guess...I guess... I guess...
You have no rights. You don't belong. You can not say.
You can not say! You can not say! You can not say!
We don't belong. We can not say. We have no rights.
We have no rights! We have no rights! We have no rights!
No one can say. No one has rights. No one belongs.
No one belongs! No one belongs! No one belongs!
I was wrong! I was wrong! I was wrong!
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A Better Church
The names they held,
From past misrepresentations
Stop in the bottle,
Only at the very bottom.
Forgetting is the easy part,
So I will tell you again...
Those names are the lies,
Calculated to deceive you.
Names for another,
Trying to perceive you.
The truths you bore,
Happenstance and situation.
Lance at the scars,
Of falsely given adolations.
Remembering is the easy part,
If you allow yourself to listen...
He wanted forever
But we only asked for now
They demanded never
While they poisoned wells
Someone hated the ending
and rewrote the whole damn thing
Now we have to relive
What he wanted to ignore
I refuse to believe
I need to continue the search
You cannot redeem
I need a better church
Can't give up the dream
I demand a better church
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Excuses
The third time is a charm they say.
An excuse to fuck up the first and second.
There are other fish in the sea they say.
An excuse to give up on the fish you got.
A bird in the hand is worth three in the bush they say.
I have no fucking idea what the hell that is supposed to mean.
Let me get this straight,
I am supposed to believe everything they say.
Don't give a shit about their freedom of speech
Stop stepping all over mine. Let me have my way.
This isn't going to hurt they say.
An excuse to get some sleep at night.
If you don't stop that you'll go blind they say.
An excuse to take your pleasure away.
A stitch in time saves nine they say.
I have no fucking idea what the hell that is supposed to mean.
Let me get this straight,
I am supposed to believe everything they say.
Don't give a shit about their freedom of speech
Stop stepping all over mine. Let me have my way.
As soon as a man is born he begins to die.
Familiarity breeds contempt.
Ignorance is bliss.
No excuses, no reasons, no permissions to ask.
All you need to know is if you know nothing,
You have nothing to doubt.
So let me get this straight,
I am supposed to believe everything they say.
Don't give a shit about their freedom of speech.
They ain't said a damn thing worth listening to today.
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Take The Shot
Like this? What you thought I'd accept.
No no no, I fought you this far, I'll take the next step too.
What you wanted, and what you perceived.
Uh huh, what the hell, I'll take this the next few steps.
What I want, what you want, what we want.
What I need, what you need, what we need.
I care? You didn't think I'd give a shit.
Yeah yeah yeah, I can get out, but I can't get you.
What the hell, and what you thought.
Uh huh, what the hell, I'll take this the whole damn way.
What I want, what you want, what we want.
What I need, what you need, what we need.
What I got, what you got, what we got.
Yeah? No. No, no I can't pretend to care.
No no no, I kicked you to the curb, I'll kick again.
What's that? Nothing you got.
Uh huh, what the hell, if you'll buy the needle, I'll take the shot.
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Alone Again
When I find you, you know you ain't gonna make it out alive.
And when I hurt you, you know you did it first so don't you cry.
And when I loved you, it was then you had the chance to try.
So now I hate you, it's too late now so don't you bother to lie.
Now I, can feel, myself, open.
Alone, never, dreaming, pretend.
Forgive you afraid not never again.
Never. Again. Never. Again.
Stop your talking, let it go I'm not gonna buy this line.
Just keep walking, let your sacrifical lambs just die.
Save your complex, foreign armaments don't understand.
Lesser abstracts, complements and ignorance is wise.
Now I, can feel, myself, open.
Alone, never, dreaming, pretend.
Forgive you afraid not never again.
Never. Again. Never. Again.
Now I, can feel, myself, open.
Alone, never, dreaming, pretend.
Forgive you afraid not never again.
Never. Again. Alone. Again.
Alone. Again. Alone. Again.
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Wonder (For Noah)
As it all came down, did you have the time to wonder
Just who this child would be
Was there rain and lightning and blowing winds and thunder
Was it so much you couldn't see
Were there tears and fears and nervousness pulled asunder
Right before your two became three
So where are you going, I'd like to know
I wanna be there when you get there
Where have you been my whole life, this whole life
So soon and yet I can't remember
What it was like, what I was like, what it was
Well now you're here and I'm alive
You will see me now, and your hands reach out to wonder
Just who this old man could be
"I am scared of rain. Rain and lightning and thunder...
...but somehow I know you'll protect me."
Couldn't hear till I was much older
But I swear you were talking to me
So where are you going, I'd like to know
I wanna be there when you get there
Where have you been my whole life, this whole life
So soon and yet I can't remember
What it was like, what I was like, what it was
Now you're here and I'm alive
...Can't remember what I know that I remembered
But when I faced your sun the warmth blinded me...
So... where are you going, I'd like to know
I wanna be there when you get there
Where have you been my whole life, this whole life
So soon and yet I can't remember
What it was like, what I was like, what it was
Now you're here and I'm alive
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Return To Me
You showed me what I knew to be
A truly wrought travesty
Yet upon your brow I see
The smoothness of your certanty
Let me be don.t set me free
Make a choice not to flee
Paralyze your will to leave
Defiant to the end I.ll be
And revolution jumps up
Smites you in your mind
Till you face the cage
Don't know what you can find
The last piece in place
Down in perfect lines
You can return to me
If you don.t read the signs
Terrorize the heartless flies
Burn away their guileless lies
Until all that remains
Has no scent of alibis
And revolution jumps up
Smites you in your mind
Till you face the cage
Don.t know what you can fine
The last piece in place
Down in perfect lines
You can return to me
If you don.t read the signs
Protect yourself but not too well
I need room inside your cell
In your bed I lie awake
Until you return to me
Until you return to me
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After You Left
After you left, nothing remained.
One empty city, just a big plain.
Headed down the sidewalk, after it rained.
Shouting at cathedrals, words so profane.
Figured I'd go home, before I got tired.
So god damn tempting, start a big fire.
Let it all burn, like a pyre for the past.
Need to remember, that nothing ever lasts.
Was it hard for you?
Nearly killed me too.
Felt it all come down, and crash against me.
Nothing remains and I just want to leave.
So where are you going, I'd like to know.
Want be there when you get there, so you're not alone.
Open my arms as you open your eyes.
Then I open up mine, and your presence is a lie.
Was it hard for you?
Nearly killed me too.
Felt it all come down, and crash against me.
Nothing remains and I just want to leave.
Walked to the ocean, a beautiful day.
The same one that took you, when you went away.
Stuck my toes in the water, breathed in the salt.
Then I kept on walking, till I fell in your arms.
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Think?
Hybrid car, and fucking redwoods.
Bet you think, that rhymes.
Polar caps, and burning coal plants.
We're all fucked, in time.
Titans walk among, simple farmers.
Building castles high, above the common.
The potent contracts, passive census.
Handbasket we all, ride along in.
HIV and fucking homos.
Bet you think, that rhymes.
Nazi pope, and crooked leaders.
You all march, in time.
Shadows creep along, televisions.
Letting in the cold, poison airwaves.
Rising ocean tides, with a motive.
Dependencies we all, get along with.
Protest song, and fucking failure.
Bet you think, that rhymes.
Overseas, and burning oil fields.
You will see, in time.
Rightous book burners.
Knowledge lost to lies.
Peaceful protesters.
Set upon in trial.
Titans walk along, simple farmers.
Building castles high, above the common.
The potent contracts, passive census.
Handbasket we all, ride along in.
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Whispered Lies
Lay down across a pew or burn the symbol down
Send a messenger by folded paper
If my meanings can find a silent communication
Perhaps an image carved in names and light
For someone else to tear to the ground
Is it the way I look at you that makes you smile
Or some secret pleasure that saved itself in your mind
Ignoring the thoughts that contradict the heart
Giving in to everything caught between a whisper and a lie
Live for a brighter day or give in to despair
Take a trip by poison slip of paper
If my answers can be a god's affirmation
Maybe an image written in blood and glass
For you to shatter on the ground
Is it the way I look at you that makes you smile
Or some secret pleasure that saved itself in your mind
Ignoring the thoughts that contradict the heart
Giving in to everything caught between a whisper and a lie
It's all over or is it just beginning
Come home by way of purchased paper
If your forgiveness can be a given gift
Why not an image painted in flesh and pain
For me to carry in my thoughts
Is it the way I look at you that makes you smile
Or some secret pleasure that saved itself in your mind
Ignoring the thoughts that contradict the heart
Giving in to everything caught between a whisper and a lie
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Poser
Driving through your home town.
Coming from nowhere and heading to anywhere else.
Singing songs that no one else knows.
About a painting in the house of usher's ghost.
Treading lightly over graves of those struck twice by lightning.
Reading a book beyond understanding.
About a profession practiced in ancient Persepolis.
You're looking for Loki in the eyes of a road weary American.
Trembling from sleepless dreaming.
Found Gehenna in the shopping cart full of last night's pleasure.
Busting at the seems from all the famous secrets that only you know.
Obscure and arcane.
Obscene and profane.
The darkness within will not be contained.
Unclean and insane.
Impure and in pain.
The darkness within will not be contained.
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